Midnight Revelations
by daily-chan
Summary: A late night conversation with Sirius in the Common Room leads to Lily coming to a few revelations. Part of the A Bond of Family series.


Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of its characters. However, since Rowling discarded my favourite characters I picked them up and took them into my care to give them the love and attention they deserve...and occasionally give them reason to need that love and attention no matter how much they deserve it without needing a reason.

 _Summary: A late night conversation with Sirius in the Common Room leads to Lily coming to a few revelations._

 _Warnings: none._

 _ **Special thanks to Kitty for beta-ing this story for me and giving me endless support and inspiration for this series. Thank you for your endless patience with my grammar and for all the lessons you've taught me and are still trying to stamp into my brain.**_

 _This story is part of my A Bond of Family series but can basically be read on its own. The chronological reading order, if interested in reading more, can be found on my profile._

 _ **xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**_

It was a cold night, halfway into December, that Lily entered the dimly lit Common Room while wiping away her tears.

"Are you all right?"

Startled, she swirled into the direction the voice had come from, not having expected anyone else to still be up this late.

"What do you want, Black?" she bit out as her eyes fell upon Sirius Black, sitting on one of the oversized love-seats.

"You don't have to bite, you know? I was just asking if you were all right since you seem to be crying."

His voice was irritated and she only realised then that he was knitting, again, like he'd often been doing whenever she saw him alone these days.

"What are you making?" she immediately cursed herself for not just leaving immediately but her curiosity won.

"A sweater."

Surprised she looked at the red fabric. "Why?"

"Because there are some people in this world who refuse anything new, even when they clearly need it."

The slightly cryptic, yet honest answer surprised her as it wasn't what she had expected and she stared at him.

He was curled up on the love-seat, his cat curled up against his side as he was knitting expertly.

Nothing unusual there, but for the first time in a long period, she found herself actually looking at the older Black sibling and was surprised by the almost content air that seemed to radiate from him.

He had a healthy tan on what she'd been certain was usually pale skin, even though it was the middle of winter and as her eyes fell upon the faded blue sweater he was wearing over his pyjama's, one that she was fairly certain belonged to Remus Lupin, she couldn't help but smile.

"So that is where Lupin's been getting those new clothes of his."

"Got a problem with that?" his tone was hostile and Lily almost snapped back automatically, but held her tongue at the last moment.

Because she was actually watching him for a change, she'd noticed his entire posture had turned defensive and she realised he had interpreted her smile as mocking.

"No...I didn't mean...I...it's nice of you to do that for him, Black."

Merlin knew the only responsible of those four needed some kindness as he was often sickly and Lily had noticed his possessions were old and worn out.

"We take care of our own," came the short reply and Lily knew this was true.

She might believe that Black and Potter were arrogant toe-rags, but even she couldn't deny that they always looked after the other two members of their group.

Unwillingly the thought of what Sever- Snape, had told her crossed her mind and she wondered if anything would change if those boys would find out their dorm-mate and close friend was a werewolf as she suspected thanks to her former friend.

But the answer came to her almost immediately and was surprisingly simple; nothing would change as there was no way they didn't know.

With how close those four were and how protective the two dark-haired of the group were, there was no doubt in her mind about their knowledge.

And she found herself admiring the two mischief-makers, not for their magical talents, but for the bonds they so clearly shared with the others, having their back no matter what.

Not even the horrid prank Sever- Snape claimed Black had played had broken the close bond between them as they almost seemed like brothers, and suddenly Lily couldn't stop the tears from running down.

"Hey...don't cry..." she accepted the handkerchief he transfigured out of a stray piece of wool, a little surprised at his tact and wiped her eyes.

"Thanks," she also accepted the glass of water he got out of nowhere and held out to her.

"No problem," he looked at her for a brief moment before refocusing on his knitting, not enquiring further and clearly giving her privacy as she took a sip from the glass.

"My sister hates me," she suddenly blurted out to Sirius Black of all people and wished the ground would swallow her whole.

"Her loss."

"What?" surprised her head snapped up to him just in time to see him shrugging.

"I said, it's her loss," he sighed, clearly interpreting the disbelief on her face correctly. "Look, I know that I hardly know you, but I do know that you are a good person. So if she hates you, then that is her own loss."

"She's my sister," Lily sank down on the chair across of him.

"She's a relative. Unless you want her to be part of your family that is all she is."

"That's an easy thing to say, Black," Lily snorted.

"Just because you are related, it doesn't make her family. Family is what you choose yourself and it isn't defined in blood."

"You truly believe that you can just renounce your blood like that?"

"It's what I did," Black shrugged and she was suddenly forcefully reminded that the boy before her had indeed done just that.

He'd left his home and renounced the Blacks as his family in a very public display when his mother had come to Hogwarts in a fit of rage the previous school year.

Lily had been both horrified and impressed by how he had just stood there as the woman screamed at him, calling him all sorts of horrible things under the sun, clearly intent to humiliate and belittle him.

But he had just stared at her unimpressed, silencing her when she began to insult the Potters and telling her just what a worthless hag he thought she was.

He had spelled her to eat soap for the things she had said about them and told her to go yell at her real son because he would be ashamed to be associated with the likes of her and had better things to do than to listen to her and had threatened her to leave his family alone or he'd make her.

"James, Remus, their parents and Peter are my family. The Blacks are relatives I unfortunately share the same blood with," Black continued, unaware of her thoughts.

He placed his knitting down on his left, caressing a hand over his cat's head as she looked up at the different movement.

"Why does your sister hate you?"

"Because I'm a freak," Lily clenched her fists and almost missed the slight tensing of his body as he shifted.

"Because you're magical and she's not?"

Lily noticed Black was awfully perceptive, despite all she wasn't saying and closed her eyes as she nodded, waiting for him to start laughing at her stupidity to care.

"So she hates you because she is jealous of what you can do. Can't say I'd blame her."

Surprised Lily looked up to him in time to see him conjure several colourful butterflies wandlessly.

"I mean, who wouldn't want to be able to do this?" a small smile crossed his lips as his cat immediately jumped up to catch them.

Lily couldn't help the small smile that spread over her own lips as she watched him direct the butterfly his cat was after so she had to chase it.

"So you think she's just jealous and that's why she's treating me so horrible?" it was what her friends had told her repeatedly and logically she knew it was true. But she found it difficult to believe and was curious to what Black's reasoning would be.

"You're smart, use your brain," he shot her a look that told her he was just entertaining her for now and knew she was already aware. "Tell me, when did she begin acting like this?"

"When I became friends with Sever- Snape and he told me the things I could do meant I was a witch," she answered honestly.

"I forgot you already knew that creep when you came to Hogwarts," Black glanced at her.

"He's not a..." Lily wasn't sure why she was trying to defend her former friend, knowing Black couldn't care less and was relieved that he waved her words off.

"Any guy who spies on girls in the bathroom without their knowledge is a creep in my eyes."

"Don't you and Potter do that too?" she blinked at the almost disgusted glance he shot her.

"There's this thing called decency that my friends and I have. We don't stoop so low to humiliate girls and violate their privacy. But anyway, so her behaviour changed from then? You got along perfectly before that?"

She shot him an odd look as she realised he was actually discussing her sister with her like they themselves got along perfectly and she wondered if perhaps she had misjudged his immaturity as he seemed quite serious now.

"We were very close," Lily confirmed.

"But that changed when you struck up a friendship with the git?"

"Yes, it honestly deteriorated beyond repair when Sever- Snape saw a letter from Dumbledore to my sister and I mentioned it to her at the station," she cursed her own inability to call her former friend by his surname, automatically calling him like she'd always done. But Black didn't call her on it.

"She requested to be able to go to Hogwarts with you?"

"How did you know?" Lily asked surprised.

"And how are both of your relationships with your parents?" Black inquired further, ignoring her question.

"Good," Lily frowned, not sure what her parents had to do with this.

"Are they proud of you?"

"Of course. They are very enthusiastic and support me tremendously."

"In front of your sister?"

And just like that Lily understood where he was going.

"You think she is jealous because our parents are proud of me?"

"Not only does her little sister have these abilities that she does not and at that same time disappearing into a world where she cannot follow," Black Vanished the butterflies. "But her parents are also proud and supportive of said sister, probably unintentionally giving you more attention than her because of that. She probably feels left out and resents you for it because you're the one with these special abilities."

"That's...rather insightful of you, Black," Lily mused as she thought about what he said. Was that truly why Petunia treated her so horribly?

"Just because you think I'm an idiot, doesn't mean I actually am," Black shrugged.

"I don't...I know you're not idiots, you just act like it," Lily admitted.

"So, because we play pranks we are idiots?" Black raised an eyebrow at her amused.

"Why do you play pranks so much?" Lily asked, suddenly curious when he picked up his knitting again.

"It are dark enough times as it is with the war going on. The students deserve to have a laugh in these dark times. And it is fun and educational for us, too."

Lily stared at Black, amazed by his words.

She knew it was true that the students were worried about their families and the war going on outside the doors of Hogwarts as they feared getting the news that someone they knew had been killed.

She also knew that most of the students enjoyed the pranks the Marauders played and looked forward to the next one as it let them forget their worries for a while and simply enjoy themselves.

But she never would have thought they were aware what their actions meant to the other students and specifically aimed to lighten people's worries the way they did, having believed they only pulled pranks to disrupt the peace.

But even as she became aware that she might have misjudged their intentions, she also realised she didn't truly know much about any of them.

Their first meeting had set the course of how they interacted and she had always looked at the two ringleaders with disdain, even if she didn't hate them like most seemed to think.

She watched as his cat jumped back up onto the love-seat with him and curled up against his side again.

Black seemed to have been thinking along the same lines as he looked up to her again after several minutes had passed in silence.

"Since we've been acting civilly for a change and asking various questions, can I ask you something without you immediately jumping to defensive or becoming mad?"

"Sure."

"Why do you hate James so much?"

"I don't hate him, I just think he's arrogant and a bully," Lily sighed as she should have suspected he'd try to put in a good word for his friend.

"Because he and your friend Snape clash often?" Black seemed simply curious, not defensive of his friend so Lily simply shrugged.

"He bullies other students, too."

"Does he now? And how do you know that?" Black cocked his head to the side as he looked at her, eerily similar to how a cat would stare at something interesting.

"Because I see him hex people out of nowhere. And not just Slytherins either. He also targets Ravenclaws," she wasn't sure why she was trying to defend her opinion of the dark-haired bespectacled Gryffindor.

"Have you ever wondered why he does that?"

"Why he...there's a reason other than that he's bored and can do so?" Lily asked, surprised when Black simply shrugged.

"I don't know, you're the one who apparently has him all figured out."

He still didn't sound defensive and Lily frowned, confused to what he was playing at.

"Then why do you think he targets people the way he does?" she challenged.

"It doesn't matter what I think as I know why he does it. Perhaps you should truly open your eyes before you judge someone based upon what you think is the truth," Black turned his piercing gaze back to his work and Lily swallowed, wondering what he meant by that.

She had seen Potter target different people without any provocation at all and had immediately judged him for it. Was there a story behind what he did? A reason?

"He always targeted Sever-Snape without being provoked, too. Always has," she pointed out.

"Has he? As far as I remember Snape was the one who made fun of James for wanting to go to Gryffindor like his father before him when we all first met, laughed at him for preferring to be brawny over brainy."

Lily opened her mouth to argue that, but snapped it close as she realised he was right, Sever-Snape had been the one to make the first rude comment and the other two had answered back.

"Has that happened more often?" she wasn't aware she had asked the question out loud until Black answered.

"I won't deny that we haven't singled him out before, but I can look at myself in the mirror without disgust because I know none of us has ever bullied him without being provoked, no matter what you might think."

Piecing grey eyes stared at her and Lily shifted, uncomfortable under the intense stare.

"We target him openly and in public while he acts when our backs are turned and in secrecy. Also, we change his clothes and make fun of him, never harming beyond humiliation while he uses every opportunity to attempt to hurt us with dark magic and harmful spells."

"You target him with a group," Lily couldn't help but point out.

"We stand together as one, but we've never attacked him as a group. Unlike him, only James or I single him out and never behind his back. Remus and Peter have never done a single thing but just stand with us," Black snorted. "Might look intimidating to come at him with a group of four, but everyone knows only James or I act and never together."

"Has he targeted Lupin or Pettigrew?" but even as she asked the question, she already knew the answer.

S-Snape had always been obsessed with where Lupin went once a month and followed him and the others around, both to figure out where he went and trying to get them into trouble. Of course he would have targeted at least Lupin on multiple occasions.

And Lily knew with certainty that Lupin would never have initiated a confrontation, the tall boy was much too shy, level-headed and withdrawn for that.

She also knew that if S-Snape had target Lupin, the other two would have retaliated upon discovering it, no matter how much time might have passed as they wouldn't let an attack on their friends happen like that.

Wondering just how often she had only seen the retaliations of Black and Potter after S-Snape had targeted Lupin or Pettigrew, she suddenly realised she might have completely misjudged their characters and admitted as much.

"People always believe what they can see. Wizards especially are very good at taking things at face value and not bothering to see what's under the surface."

"I guess you are right. That doesn't stop Potter from being an arrogant git, though," she blinked surprised when Black choked out a laugh at the insult at his friend's address.

"I won't deny that James can be pretty arrogant, but he's a good guy and very kind," Black looked at her calculating for a moment. "He truly likes you, you know?"

"Yeah? He's got a rubbish way of showing it," Lily chuckled when Black nodded. "Aren't you supposed to defend your best friend and not agree with me?"

"Why deny the truth? He is rubbish at showing he likes you and does all the wrong things to try and get your attention."

"That's the understatement of the year," Lily snorted.

"True, why don't you tell me what he has to do to make a positive impression on you?"

"Are you trying to set me up with him?" she was surprised to note that she was actually enjoying his company and didn't truly mind the topic.

"No, just trying to figure out what it will take to get him to be treated like a human being."

"I have always treated him rather harshly, haven't I?" Lily mused.

"Sometimes he deserved it," Black shrugged, unconcerned.

"But not all the time," Lily filled in what Black wasn't saying and sighed.

"Tell you what, if you get him to stop asking me out constantly, then I'll try to treat him normally," she bargained.

"I'll try. Any other pointers?" she laughed as Black turned his full attention to her again.

"Just because I'll try to treat him normally, doesn't mean I'll go out with him, you know?"

"I'm not asking you to, but perhaps you could get to know each other and become somewhat civil in conversations," Black shrugged, continuing his knitting.

"All right, he could deflate his head somewhat and stop constantly running his hands through his hair, it's irritating."

"Yeah, not going to happen. I can work on the deflating part, but the hair thing is a tic. He's always doing that unconsciously, especially when he's nervous or frustrated. Dad does it too; it's a Potter trait, I think."

Lily glanced at him, surprised to hear him refer to Potter's father as dad. But as he seemed unaware of it, she held her tongue, not wanting to break the comfortable atmosphere hanging between them.

"I'll give him that then. What about his constantly harassing me and acting like I walk on clouds?"

"Got it, no worshipping the ground you walk on and no compliments," Black nodded and Lily flushed as she began to realise he was truly serious.

"Compliments aren't bad, but they have to be meant and sincere," she found herself saying.

"So no lying about liking something truly hideous, just because you happen to like it," Black grinned suddenly. "Does that mean I can tell you that the bathrobe you are wearing is absolutely hideous without you getting mad at me and trying to hex me?"

Lily glanced down at her orange bathrobe confused.

"What's wrong with my bathrobe?"

"It's bright orange and you have flaming red hair, the clash is horribly painful to the eyes. The only reason no one tells you so is because they don't want to upset you," Black told her honestly.

"You don't seem to have that problem," Lily chuckled.

"I believe you won't be upset if I'm honest with you and I don't have a crush on you."

"Thankfully not, no," Lily laughed as Black grinned again.

"Seriously though, you should change the colour or someone will burn it someday."

"It was a birthday gift from my sister."

"Then it is true, she truly hates you," the comment should have hurt but Lily was surprised to find herself laugh at Black's words and glanced down at the bathrobe again.

"What colour should it be then? Pink?" she teased as she realised that yes, Petunia probably had sent this colour to her on purpose.

"Do you have a secret sadistic side?" Lily grinned as Black raised an eyebrow at her.

"Well, why don't you make a suggestion?"

"Based upon your complexion, hair and eye colour, I'd say green would be a good colour on you."

"A Gryffindor wearing green?" Lily was the one raising an eyebrow now, not able to believe what she was hearing.

"Slytherins do not own that colour, just as Gryffindor doesn't own the colour red. It's pure prejudice that makes people believe that," Black shrugged. "If you want to wear something green, then who's going to stop you? But if you want to play it safe, blue would work brilliantly too."

"When did you become such an expert in colours?" Lily asked as she considered what he was saying.

"I should hope that after following art class for over three and a half years, I've become somewhat knowledgeable about colours."

Lily laughed, never having known just how witty Black could be and found she enjoyed both his wit and great sense of humour.

"Petunia will be upset if I return home this Christmas with a different coloured bathrobe."

"Why don't you make it so that Muggles see the bathrobe as orange, but everyone magical sees a different colour? That way you can't forget to change the colour back when you return home, while at the same time not traumatise your fellow Gryffindors with the horror of that colour combination. Plus you will not upset your sister despite her horrible gift as she sees exactly what she gave you."

"That's...I never would have thought to do that," Lily admitted.

"Probably because you've never had to hide anything," Black shrugged and Lily wondered what Black could have wanted to hide.

But she didn't want to intrude on his privacy and pointing her wand at her robes, she quickly changed the colour to blue.

"Safety first, hm?"Lily grinned at his words.

"Thank you, Black," her smile faded as his expression sobered.

"We're getting along fairly well right now, right?"

"We are. I hope we'll continue treating each other normally after tonight, too," Lily wasn't afraid to freely admit she enjoyed his company and would like to get to know him better.

"Having that in mind, could you stop calling me Black? I ran away from that family because I hated the whole lot of them and although I am still the heir to the family, I don't like being associated with the name constantly."

"Understandable, what would you like me to call you then?"

"Well, you could try calling me by my given name," he teased and Lily blushed as it had completely slipped her mind.

"Then you have to call me Lily," she bargained, laughing as he held out a hand.

"Pleasure to meet you, Lily."

"Likewise, Sirius," she shook his hand before glancing at his knitting. "How far are you with that sweater of yours?"

"About done. I'll start putting it together tomorrow so it'll be done in time for Christmas," he cleared his knitting away into his bag. "But coming back to our previous subject, compliments are only welcome when sincere and no harassing you. Any other pointers?"

"Not really," Lily replied after thinking it through for a long moment.

"So, if I get him to stop harassing you or asking you out and work on deflating his ego, you'd be willing to give him a chance?"

"As a friend?"

"Pfff, the moment you get to know the real him, you'll fall in love with him," Bla-Sirius put on such an air of confidence that Lily couldn't help but laugh.

"I doubt it, but if you manage all that, then I'll give him a fair chance. As a friend," she added quickly.

"That is all I ask," B- Sirius smiled. "Thank you, Lily."

"I should thank you. I didn't expect to be cheered up when I came down here tonight."

"Unexpected things happen every day," Sirius shrugged, petting his cat as it moved onto his lap.

"You have a beautiful cat, I never did find out where you got it. May I pet her?" she reached out, surprised when the cat immediately moved back against Sirius' torso and looked up to him as if to ask reassurance that she was all right.

"Wizzy was a Christmas gift from James in our third year after my owl got killed," Sirius smiled, giving the cat a small nod.

Immediately she leaned forward to allow Lily to brush a hand over her soft grey and black head and Lily smiled as he petted the beautiful cat.

"Aren't you beautiful?" Lily cooed at her, smiling when a small white paw reached out to play with her hand. "Why on earth did you call her Wizzy?"

"James thought it was a funny name," Sirius shrugged, glancing at his watch for the time. "You should return to bed if you want to be remotely fit for class tomorrow morning."

"You're not going back to bed?" Lily asked surprised as she leaned back into her chair.

"I'm waiting for James to return from detention, he'll be back any minute now."

"That's nice of you," Lily smiled as she rose to her feet.

"I have my moments."

"Yes, you do," Lily readily agreed and dipped her head in greeting. "Good night, Sirius."

"Night, Lily," Sirius smiled up to her.

Lily made her way back to her dorm, pausing in closing the door completely as the Portrait of the Fat Lady swung open and James Potter climbed through.

"Hey," she watched from the darkness as Potter approached Sirius, dropping down into the chair she had just vacated.

"Hey, did you have another nightmare?" the softly asked question made Lily swallow thickly.

She had never asked why Sirius had been up so late in the first place and now she felt guilty for not having noticed anything amiss when he shrugged and Potter sighed.

"I figured I'd get some work done while I waited for you to return. What did Filch have you do this time?"

"Just clean the trophy room without magic, again. Good thing the git can't tell the difference between wandless magic and hours of rubbing at something with a rag," Potter grinned as he held out a hand. "Come, you at least need to try and get some more sleep. Merlin knows you need it."

"I don't think Merlin cares about how much sleep I get, James," but Sirius smiled as he picked Wizzy up and let Potter pull him to his feet.

"Hey, sweetie. Are you ready for bed, too?" James cooed at the cat, rough-housing with her for a moment before pulling Sirius with him towards their dorm and Lily silently let the dorm door fall shut so he wouldn't spot her.

Turning away from the door, she made her way to her bed and shrugged off her now blue bathrobe before slipping between the sheets, thinking of what she had learned tonight and decided that she would not only give Potter a chance, but all four of them.

A smile curled around her lips as she found she actually looked forward to getting to know those boys properly.

And who knew, perhaps Sirius would be right and she would find a good friend in James Potter.


End file.
